I feel like we all need a pick-me-up these days, so let’s play a game.
Think of someone you love. It could be a partner or good friend or beloved pet.
Now imagine what life would be like if you had never found them.
You would be in a different place in your life, perhaps literally–maybe you’d trade spiked apple cider in New England for margs on a beach in Miami.
Beyond logistical changes, you also wouldn’t have the joy that this person or passion brings you. Think of what you would lose without their presence in your life.
I know, I know–how is this supposed to be a feel-good?!
While it feels like a mean joke to think of the loss of something good that we currently have, it can be a way to more acutely feel our blessings. Loss aversion tells us that we hate losing what we have more than gaining something new. Now, we can use this tendency for good.
I think of the joy that my two cats bring me. They make me laugh at their antics, snuggle me when I feel down, and consistently make me feel special by snubbing strangers.
Imagining life without them helps clarify exactly what I love so much about them. I’m not a fan of forced gratitude, but I can’t help but feel grateful for them.
When you think about the absence of your special person, it can help you pinpoint just what you appreciate. It brings an extra level of clarity.
And hopefully, that makes you feel just a little bit better.
To being better without forgetting what we have,
Elizabeth